We continue our series on drug abuse and its devastating impact on families. The following story is fictitious but realistic, reflecting a situation many people may face. It is written in the first person, but the names and places do not refer to real individuals.
What happened before:
Vho Joyce Rambani called an urgent family meeting after discovering that her son, Dembe, had abandoned his studies at a Pretoria university and was living in a Johannesburg squatter camp. She believed his behaviour was due to witchcraft, while his father attributed it to drug abuse.
The meeting, which included close relatives and a pastor, quickly descended into conflict as the parents clashed over the cause of Dembe’s decline.
During the exchange, Mr Rambani said he had separated from his wife, citing her refusal to accept evidence of Dembe’s drug use and alleged involvement in a drug syndicate, as well as messages suggesting he planned to steal his father’s bakkie to settle debts. He also alleged a disturbing incident in which Dembe was found in his sister Lizzy’s bedroom, which he interpreted as a sexual assault attempt, while Joyce maintained that all the problems were the result of witchcraft. The meeting ended without resolution, leaving the family divided and the circumstances around Dembe’s downfall still disputed.
The dark side of society’s young people
Mr Rambani’s revelations grew darker. “What Joyce did not tell you,” he said, “is that since I left the house, Dembe has tried several times to force himself on her – yes, his own mother. She called me two days ago, but I told her I would not address such a matter unless she called a meeting with her relatives. I thought she would speak about the attempted rape, but she kept silent. I even felt a strange relief, thinking it would open her eyes. But she still blamed my mother and siblings.”
He added: “One night he came home with sealed boxes of tinned fish. I knew they were stolen. The next day there was a break-in at a spaza shop. Instead of reprimanding him, Joyce hid the boxes under our bed. I told her never to serve me that fish. Within two days, the boxes were gone – sold off.”
“Can you see the danger I lived in? How can I be head of the family when every decision is opposed? There is no TV in this house – the plasma I bought was stolen within three weeks. No forced entry. Dembe was absent that night, but I knew he had stolen and sold it. I kept quiet to avoid more accusations. My daughters suffer most, yet still side with their mother.”
He said a social worker had been called in, but found deeper family breakdown. “'Since I came here, all I see are divisions and fighting,’ she said. ‘You both need help before I can take the boy to rehab. Without unity, rehab will not work.’”
Before she could finish, Joyce interrupted: “Don’t even mention rehab! My child is normal. It’s the work of people making him behave irrationally.”
Mr Rambani said he then realised there was nothing more he could do. “It hurts me as a father, but what choice do I have?”
Every evening, Joyce performs a ritual with bottled “holy water” from Pastor Luruli, sprinkling it around the house and fence while chanting: “Go away evil spirit, go back to your sender.” She names people, starting with her mother-in-law, then her husband’s sisters and neighbours.
“I have warned her about accusing neighbours without proof, but my words fall on deaf ears,” he said.
Mr Rambani concluded his story with the words: “Today, I am a free man.”
VKRA remarks
Denial and superstition cannot solve real problems.
Families must confront reality, not blame relatives or neighbours without evidence.
False accusations destroy trust and deepen division.
Without parental action, children can spiral into crime and addiction.
Families must unite; broken relationships worsen the crisis.
Early professional help can save lives.
It’s a dangerous world we live in
South Africa is one of the most lucrative drug markets globally.
Youth unemployment stands at over 61%, with more than 10.3 million young people aged 15–24 unemployed, including graduates. Poverty and inequality push some towards crime as a survival strategy.
Drug syndicates often lure unemployed graduates and desperate women. Gender-based violence remains high, with over 50,000 sexual offences reported annually. Criminal networks flaunt luxury lifestyles while many graduates remain jobless, reinforcing the belief that “crime pays”.
What men can do to fight the scourge
Drug abuse and crime are community problems. As men, fathers and leaders, silence is not an option.
Peaceful civic action: Organise marches to police stations and provincial offices, demanding accountability and independent oversight of drug seizures.
Education and awareness: Create community centres where parents and youth learn early signs of drug abuse, supported by professionals, social workers and recovered addicts.
Support structures: Build youth programmes through sports, training and mentorship, and support families navigating rehabilitation.