During National Women's Day, two victims of gender-based violence, Ms Fulufhelo Manngo and Ms Lindelani Muthambi, reached out to women in their local community to share their traumatic encounters as a way of helping each other to heal. The event took place at Lapani Phangami near Thohoyandou.
The session was led by Ms Maria Napjadi Mahlo, a renowned motivational speaker, writer and life coach. Mahlo is the author of Mosaic Yangu, a Memoir which details her multiple childhood traumas, ranging from being abandoned at the age of four to being raped at the age of six, 12 and 14. At the age of 17, she became a teenage mother, which only exposed her to further emotional, physical and financial abuse from her partner. Her book tells the story of how she had managed to walk away from the toxic relationship and embark on a journey of self-healing.
Mahlo is the founder of the Power Within Unleashed, an organisation whose mission is to guide this generation to be liberated from their past and unleash the power within them to walk in pursuit of their purpose as they become the change they want to see in their communities.
During the event, 25 women from different walks of life gathered and shared their traumatic encounters, which mostly occurred between the ages of five and 12. Some continued into their adult lives as they were violated by their partners. Most of these abusers are people known to their victims, ranging from fathers and uncles to neighbours.
Sadly, none of these women was ever given an opportunity to heal or find justice for the wrong done to them which, according to Mahlo, only shows that sexual violence remains an unspoken monster in our society as it continues to ravage women and children. "Most of these wounded women never spoke about their trauma until now. Some were too young to even understand what was happening and those who found their voice and told their parents or caregivers (orphaned or abandoned as young girls) were told to never speak about it, in fear of loss of food or a place to stay. Others were encouraged to be silent for the sake of dignity, while some feared for their lives as the perpetrator vowed to kill them if they reported the crime," Mahlo said. "These women have lived most of their lives carrying the shame and guilt for crimes which were committed against them. A burden which ought to be carried by the perpetrator."
Mahlo encouraged women to speak up. "It is the silence of the victims and those who witness these inhumane crimes which give perpetrators the power to continue on their rampage of sexual violations. They believe that they are invisible because no one is holding them accountable for their crimes. Most of these incidents occurred decades ago; however, they were never reported. The pain remains raw, and healing is needed."
Statistics show that only one in four rapes is reported in South Africa and only an estimated 14% of the perpetrators of rape are convicted.
Manngo and Muthambi, with the help of Mahlo, intends to hold these women's hands and guide them to embark on their healing journey, as well as find justice for the crimes committed against them.